Did you find yourself falling for a girl, but don’t know if she’s feeling the same way? Don’t worry. You’re not the only one. Most people still find it difficult to figure out whether a person likes them or not.
Even when there are a million ways to communicate our feelings to each other—through body language, for instance—some may still struggle to find the hints.
Yes, women give hints. Some are subtle, and some are not; all you need to do is figure them out.
To somewhat understand women psychology, we asked experts to share some valuable tips that will answer your question.
Clinical Psychotherapist | Counselor
Note the word elective because forced proximity is different. If she’s choosing to be around you when she could be choosing to be literally anywhere else in the world. We’ve all seen the obvious “I don’t want to be here” body language. That means something.
Related: The 10 Best Books on Body Language
If they’re putting themselves within proximity to further the relationship it’s at least hopeful. If there are multiple reasonable suitors present pay attention to who she is gravitating to more.
Strong eye contact
Particularly outside of the conversation. It’s not empirical but a lot of girls have perfected the art of avoiding or minimizing eye contact with people they do not want to engage. If she’s choosing to watch your eyes it is a good sign.
Just ask her
It’s old fashioned and direct but if you like her and want to know if she likes you, just ask her. If the answer is no… listen. Don’t get weird. If the answer is unsure once again don’t get weird and keep paying attention. If the answer is yes, It’s entirely possible that she likes you.
It’s better than wondering and it allows you to not chase someone who doesn’t want your attention.
Founder, Certified Matchmaker
She’s comfortable with you in her space
When a woman likes you, there is a very obvious, visible sign to take notice. Her body language will never be stiff or turned away from you, with her torso parallel to your torso at all times.
A woman that is not interested will shift her body into another direction, even though her face is still facing yours, hoping and praying that the fire alarm goes off so that she can end the conversation and carry on with her day, without you. Her body language is important. Is her torso facing yours? Or is her torso facing the exit sign? This never fails!
She makes the time for you
When a woman likes you, she will make time for you, even if her schedule doesn’t allow it. She will find a way. Her excitement in wanting to see you will trump the extra sleep she needs to get, or, she may even cancel plans that she had with a girlfriend, just for you! Sure, there will be times that she may not be available, but if that happens too often, it may be her way of dismissing you.
I remember when I was dating my husband, I was working 12 hour days, 9 a.m.to 9 p.m. during the week. I couldn’t wait to see him on the weekends, so I made time, midweek, to meet up with him for a drink, even if it was just for an hour. Even though I was exhausted after working all day, I was really excited to see him and made time in my busy schedule.
She introduces you to her family & friends
This is huge. If a woman is introducing you to her inner circle, I can guarantee you that she is really feeling you. She is well aware that when you leave, her squad will be asking her all sorts of questions about you, and guess what?
She will be prepared and happy to answer them, because she was proud to bring you into the presence of the people that matter to her the most.
Relationship Coach | Co-Founder & LCSW, A Good First Date
Several key clues that can help you
There are several key clues that can help you figure out whether a girl likes you!
How often do you spend time with her?
When a girl is interested in you, she will want to spend more time with you (and more one on one time!). Two important questions to ask yourself are: Is the girl you’re pursuing responsive when you ask her to spend time together? Does she invite other people or try to spend time solo with you?
What is her body language like when you are together?
If a girl is feeling you, she will demonstrate clues in the way she interacts and engages with you. Often times she will find reasons to make physical contact with you during the conversation, maybe a light touch on the arm or leg, a hug, or even playful rough-housing. She will also stand closer to you, focus her attention on you, and make eye contact often.
Does she flirt with you?
Flirting can look different depending on the person, but often times this can include being playful, teasing, laughing & smiling. She will seem very engaged and present with you at the moment. She will likely keep things light, and ask engaging questions, showing a desire to learn more about you.
What does she discuss with you?
This can vary from person to person, but in addition to #3, it’s likely she’s into you if she is not talking about other persons of interest in your presence. When a girl is trying to “friend zone” someone she will likely seek advice from you and be focused on discussing other dating/relationship issues. She is also more likely to remember things about you from past conversations!
Master Confidence and Relationship Expert
If a woman is in touch with one of her many superpowers – flirting, it won’t be too hard to tell if she likes you. There is a myriad of ways women can subliminally, yet powerfully let a guy know she is into him.
First, her eyes. Women have an innate ability to use their eyes to draw you in.
The second way you can tell if a woman likes is her through body language. Her body will send signals to your body that will instantly let you know it is safe to approach her.
Lastly, her smile. A woman’s smile is a dead giveaway in her expressing interest in you.
Slow down and listen
Let’s be real. It doesn’t matter if just any girl likes you. Crazy bitch drama queens could like you. No thanks.
What we’re really asking here is how to tell if a HEALTHY girl likes you. How do you tell if she’s healthy?
If there’s too much infatuation texting all the time, it’s not healthy. If there are games to make you jealous, it’s not healthy.
If she takes her time to get to know you, talks kindly of her ex’s or men in general, if she knows who she is and what she wants or at least is committed to figuring it out, and she thinks your Warcraft collection is pretty cool even if she’s not into it, we have a healthy one! Move forward.
The next step to know if this healthy girl likes you is… she’ll touch your arm, giggle at your jokes, be grateful for you picking up the meal, defend you if someone isn’t cool, remember shit like your baseball tryout.
Lastly, trust your knowing. Slow down and listen. Your gut always knows.
Content manager, ReviewingThis
While it is sometimes difficult to discern if a girl “likes you,” simply because everyone is different and you’ll probably get very different signals and cues based on your experiences with every woman, here are a few signs things are probably moving in the right direction:
Response times to contact
If you’re receiving a contact back from a woman via phone, text, or email shortly after a date (and it seems like positive confirmation), this is a fairly good sign that date has gone well and things are progressing in the right direction. Bonus points if one or both of you even reach out right after the first date!
Positive body language
While it may seem cliche, there is no denying that a woman who likes you will be aware of her appearance, smile, and may even take an “extra trip” to the bathroom during your date where she arrives back a bit more polished and with her makeup freshened up. She wants to put on her best presentation for you because she cares!
Gestures of kindness
A woman who thanks you, acts overtly polite, makes subtle body contact, and attempts a small rub of the hand or way to get closer to you (even if it’s crossing her legs towards you), is asking you to make a move! Go for it!
Asking you to meet her friends or those close to her
While this may come a bit later on, inviting you to an outing where friends or people close to her will be attending is a very strong suggestion that a girl has feelings for you, or at least, wants to get a sense of how you’d fit in in a longer-term sense with her life and group. Great sign and opportunity to make a positive impression!
She says yes to last-minute plans or dates
This is a tricky one, as many girls aren’t up for impromptu plans and she may simply be a busy gal, but if she makes the time to schedule something around you and her own plans, or at the last minute, this is a pretty strong signal that you matter to her and she likes you a lot!
Content Marketing Associate, The Zebra
As a female-identifying human for the past twenty-four years, I will hardly pretend to be an expert in the arts of general flirtation. That being said, I definitely know what a girl wants.
If I like a guy, he’s pretty much on my mind all the time. My social feeds become little machines that ding every time I come across something he’d like.
When I do find something that I think he would find funny, or exciting, or interesting, I send it over to him with a little note as to why I think he’d like it. These little messages can be everything from a new movie trailer, a great meme, or a weird picture of a dog eating treat that says, “dis you.”
Of course, there’s nothing better when he sends something back to me, something that reminded him of me. In both instances, this is a reflection of their inner thoughts and obviously, the receiver of my memes will be at the forefront of everything.
Plus, I always get a big smile on my face when I see that he’s sent me something — another great indicator of whether or not a girl likes you.
- Get professional counseling from a licensed therapist.
- Individual and couples counseling. Anytime, anywhere.