In this article, you’ll discover 7 Bad Personality Traits, people that can be poisonous in your life and drag you down. Find out how to avoid falling into their traps and what lessons can you learn from these seven bad personality traits and improve even more your positive character.
Do you believe there is something good in all people? At least one positive lesson to take from each person you ever meet?
I believe that there are many things to be learned from those that behave poorly and have bad personality traits. If nothing else, you can learn how not to be in this world. You can learn, also, how much influence your behavior has on others even when your actions have negative consequences mainly for you.
These 7 Bad Personality Traits (about which) we’ll talk today, affect the most the person having them but touch your life, (inadvertently or intentionally), in a negative way. Those people (having bad personality traits) can be poisonous in your life because their actions provoke a negative reaction in your body and mind.
Happiness likes company. Unfortunately, misery likes company too. People that behave negatively drag you down; more so, those that don’t seem to act against you. That happens because you don’t expect to be affected by their actions and you let your guard down.
Hasn’t happened to you to feel angry when someone is telling you (in an angry voice) about a dispute they had with someone else? They don’t fight with you, and yet, it feels like you are the target:
“Don’t get angry with me!”
“I’m not angry at you.”
“Then, why do you shout At Me?”
Poisonous, right? Literally, poisonous because, as a result of others bad behaviors, your body produces the emergency mode hormones that put you in a very bad mood.
Who are the people that can drag you down?
Check out these 7 Bad Personality Traits (People That Can Be POISONOUS in Your Life) and how to avoid falling into their trap:
1. The first personality trait that can poison your life: People with an excessive sense of entitlement
People with an excessive sense of entitlement can make you feel frustrated like no others:
- They have a total disregard for your (others) well-being, comfort, feelings, time, responsibilities, and priorities.
- The rules and society’s norms don’t apply to them, only to you and others.
- Expect to comply with their demands like you and the universe owe them something and everything.
- Consider themselves the center of your world. “So, better not forget (ever) they are more important than you.”
- Think that is no problem to offend you; “you can take it, and they deserve your everything.”
These are examples of an extreme, excessive sense of entitlement. However, most times you’ll be affected negatively by those with a more subtle sense of entitlement; those astute in the art of taking advantage of you.
How to recognize them?
- People with a (covert) excessive sense of entitlement are all about “me, me, me”; You don’t exist as a person, but a mere object at their disposal.
They follow their goal by lying to you, cheating, and sometimes, even stealing. When you caught them red-handed, react like a spoiled child (shout, cry, throw things, a full-blown rage fit)… and at the end, somehow is your fault the way they behaved.
- People with a (covert) excessive sense of entitlement impose on you unrealistic demands and expectations.
You see? You don’t always have the time to think about what others ask of you. That happens most often when the other person portray themselves as an authority figure using a rough tone of voice (raised voice), dominating body language, verbal abuse, masked threats, seemingly scientific arguments, stories, and proverbs.
- People with a (covert) excessive sense of entitlement don’t negotiate or compromise. Give the false impression they deserve (absolutely!) everything they are asking absolving themselves of any obligations and dumping them on you.
“You are my wife/husband; you must do it.”
“If you want to be my friend, act like it.”
“You know that’s impossible. Why do you even ask for such things?”
“I can’t believe you’re saying that! That’s stupid!”
“It’s not my fault you can’t think straight. If you were, you’d clearly see what you have to do.”
If you pay close attention, you notice that things are shifting back and forward from “me, me, me deserves” to “you, you, you must do.”
- People with a (covert) excessive sense of entitlement tell you how they are better or more important than you are by associating themselves with people you admire.
“When I was in New York, and I met Oprah, the president, the CEO of…”
“The boss, often asks me to his office to discuss important issues.”
“I know it’s hard for you to understand.”
“You don’t get it as I do.”
“I have ten years experience; what do you have?”
“If you only knew how ignorant you sound right now.”
“I have invented [that]. You can’t teach ME how it works.”
- People with a (covert) excessive sense of entitlement don’t care about your feelings…actually, they do care as long as what you feel is admiration and love for them.
Now, some things that might surprise you about people with a (covert) excessive sense of entitlement:
- They are not happy! They drift from one relationship to another because no one likes them.
- People with an excessive sense of entitlement don’t see their behavior as manipulation, but as the only way to get what they want from you. They have no idea how to communicate, or how to relate to others.
- Their actions have nothing to do with you. Don’t glance at you and think: “oh, look, a potential victim”; but, focus on themselves and think: “[That’s] mine; I deserve [that]; [this] must be mine; you owe me…” – don’t even see you…the mirror is blocking the view.
- You can pity them. Maybe they succeed and fool you a few times, but in the end, they lose. They lose respect, opportunities, and great chances to have a happy life.
You see? People that believe they are entitled to a happy life do nothing to get it.
What should you do if you have one of these people around you?
First, have compassion for them. They’ve learned to behave that way from an early age (it’s a habit). They don’t even know that the rest of us think and act differently. Feeling entitled is their way of being; it’s a personality trait.
They are like my dog; whenever the fridge door opens, he does not doubt that it opens especially for him.
Third, if those people are not a must in your life (family members), then, step aside. Make them room to leave far away from you.
2. The second personality trait that can poison your life: Critics
“Your hair’s a mess,” “Your clothes are out of fashion and dull,” “Maybe you are good at [that], but you are a catastrophe at [something more important].”
People who are happily serving you, with every opportunity, a dose of unsolicited personal subjective opinions regarding who you are, your skills, talents, and abilities are nothing more than bullies. In the name of generous feedback, they point out your flaws, shortcomings, and mistakes with total disregard for your feelings or the truth.
Because criticism is the shortest way you could lose your self-esteem and confidence, stay away from critics. Make a distinction between honest, helpful feedback and being bullied.
3. The third personality trait that can poison your life: Blaming you for their failures
Why some people blame you for their mistakes rather than taking the responsibility?
- For many people blaming other is a defense mechanism; they don’t know what to do instead, how to put things right and feel cornered and insecure;
- Some, are using the blaming game as a form of control and manipulation;
- And others learned to be that way from their parents and didn’t discover yet how to change.
No matter what the cause might be, habitual blamers are unhappy and insecure individuals. They lack social skills and the ability to accept life as it comes, therefore, feel helpless.
Note that just because you know why they are doing it and you might feel compassionate, doesn’t mean you should accept it or let yourself dragged down. Remember that your first duty is to yourself (not from a selfish point of view but a self-preservation one).
Build your mental strength and stand your ground. It’s not your fault that some people don’t know how to deal with life.
4. The fourth personality trait that can poison your life: Needy people
The needy (personality trait) people are masters at making you feel guilty. They suck the life out of you with their demands and requests using emotional blackmail on you.
Clingy individuals can be quite a challenge because they seem so harmless and helpless. If you’re not careful, you end up living only to help them. When you drop under their weight, move to the next person to take advantage of.
Unfortunately, you can’t help too much a need person. Even professionals trained to deal with them, know that these are the individuals most difficult to guide to a happy and fulfilled life. So, don’t let (their) things bother you. No matter how good-hearted you are and how big is your desire to help, these people take what’s good from you; then, leave you behind and move to the next victim.
5. The fifth personality trait that can poison your life: Complainers
It’s one thing to complain assertively about wrongdoings and another thing to express dissatisfaction and annoyance for things that are nobody’s fault or can’t be changed by the person listening.
“I can’t believe it’s November again. How dreadful!”
Complainers are dragging you down in a very sneaky and surprising way. You find yourself complaining even though you might be a positive and delightful person. You might start complaining about the fact that they are complaining. The result is to feel bad about yourself for giving in, and adopting their way of thinking.
We want to be likeable and for that reason try to shape our behaviors (and discussions) to match the person in front of us. If that person is a complainer, it takes a lot of discipline on your part, not to do the same.
6. The sixth personality trait that can poison your life: Negative attitude
To be dragged down by somebody there is no need for them to have a negative attitude toward you, it’s enough to hear their:
- self-defeated words
- negative assumptions and conclusions about self
- comparing themselves to others
- blaming the past for their current situation
- beating themselves up
- being fearful of success or/and failure
That is all it takes for someone to make you feel depressed and gloomy. And if you add to that, talking bad about other people and then about you, the list is complete. That day, you don’t want, not even to drink a glass of water, but hide somewhere and cry.
7. The seventh personality trait that can poison your life: Irresponsible individuals
This type of people can drive you insane!
We live in a society, and we expect each of us to do their part and share responsibility, care, duty and so on.
But no! Irresponsible individuals don’t care about that; they live mostly in the present moment (which is not wrong in itself), oblivious to consequences, treating most things as a joke.
Yes, they might be fun at a party and sometimes, the friend to go to when you need a dose of optimism. However, they can be challenging and a real nightmare to live with.
What can I say? Amongst all the people who can drag you down, the irresponsible ones have many positives points too. Therefore, you might love and hate to have them around. You can’t take them as a group and just avoid them all together. Instead, judge case by case and decide how to move forward.
Now, whoever wants a better life, make some changes, improve and grow as a person shouldn’t do it at your expense. Plus, there are professionals trained to guide, help and assist people with all that.
I’m all in for offering help, understanding, and support. I genuinely believe that all people have good qualities and giving the opportunity, the chance and the knowledge, people shine. However, if it comes down to choosing between your well-being and others, choose yours. Give to others a bit of yourself but not the whole you.
You deserve to have (around you) a group of people that respect, appreciate, love and value who you are.