Love can be a mysterious feeling, and trying to figure out if you’re in love can be confusing.
While there’s no one-size-fits-all answer to the question of whether or not you’re in love, there are some key signs that can give you a clue.
According to experts, here are the signs that you are falling in love.
Certified Matchmaker | CEO, Select Date Society
You are excited about the future
You find yourself looking forward to sharing future experiences together, and you make plans for future dates.
You may purchase concert tickets several months in advance, plan trips together, or even start thinking about major life decisions like purchasing a home together.
You miss them
When you are both busy and don’t get a chance to spend time together, you genuinely miss them. You crave being in their presence and look forward to seeing them again.
You would choose to spend time with them over the other people that are important to you.
You find yourself constantly occupied by thoughts of that person
You may replay conversations with them in your head, re-read text messages, or look at their photos to satisfy your craving for them.
You are almost obsessively thinking about them and find yourself daydreaming about what your life will look like together.
Your sex drive is in overdrive
When you are falling in love with someone, the attraction is magnetic.
You would never dream of telling your partner that you have a headache or are too tired for sex; Instead, you find yourself looking forward to being intimate and planning for moments when you can squeeze in a make-out session any chance you get.
You are genuinely curious about your partner
You hang on to their every word and are fascinated by what they think and feel.
You find yourself studying them, making mental notes of their habits, what they like, what they don’t like, and how they see the world. You are curious, engaged, and interested in every conversation the two of you have.
Your friends and family notice a change in you
You may suddenly become a sports fan if the person you’re falling in love with spends Sundays watching football. You may answer the phone in a flirty voice when they call.
The people around you will take notice and start to comment on your changed behavior.
You feel scared
Let’s face it… Falling in love can be scary! You may become preoccupied with thoughts of “What if this doesn’t work out?” You feel anxious or nervous as you wonder if they are feeling the same way about you.
You only see the good in your partner
When you are falling in love, you can’t see your partner’s flaws. You only see them in a positive light. Even if you notice a potential flaw, you will view it as cute or endearing.
Ketan Parmar, MD, MBBS, DPM
Counseling Psychologist | Psychiatrist and Mental Health Expert, ClinicSpots
Have you ever felt like you were falling in love with someone? Or perhaps you thought that you might be falling in love and wanted to know if it was the real thing.
Maybe you’ve been dating someone new for a few weeks, months, or even years and still can’t figure out how you really feel about them.
Whatever your particular situation may be, understanding when you’re falling in love is important so that you can decide if this is really something that you want to pursue.
Related: How Long Does It Take to Fall in Love with Someone?
Fortunately, there are several telltale signs that will clue you into whether or not your feelings are more than just friendly and fleeting.
You’re experiencing a sense of attachment and commitment to that person
When you fall in love with someone, you’re not just infatuated with them; it’s a whole different type of love altogether.
Infatuation is mostly a physical attraction that you can’t control or stop. It’s a strong desire and obsession that’s usually short-lived. It can sometimes be mistaken for love — especially if you’ve never experienced what falling in love feels like before.
On the other hand, when you’re falling in love with someone, you’re experiencing a sense of attachment and commitment to that person.
You’re not just infatuated with their looks and personality; you’re truly in love with them and see the potential for a long-term relationship and future together.
Related: The Difference Between Love and Infatuation
Your mood consistently improves when you’re with that person
When you fall in love with someone, you start to notice that your mood instantly improves when you’re with them.
You start to feel happy and excited whenever you get to spend quality time together. Even if you’re going through a difficult situation or time in your life, your loved one can help you to see things in a new light and make you feel better about everything.
When you’re in love, you want to spend as much time with that person as possible—even if the situation doesn’t call for it. You don’t mind spending the day at home together, going on a casual walk together, or just hanging out in one another’s company.
You’re genuinely happy to be with your loved one and can’t get enough of their company.
You feel anxious or worried when you think of your loved one
When you start to fall in love with someone, you’ll notice that you start to feel anxious or worried when you think of them. You might find yourself constantly wondering how they’re doing in general or feeling anxious about their health and well-being.
You might even find yourself thinking about your loved one when you should be focused on something else entirely—like work or school.
When you start to feel this type of attachment toward someone, it’s usually a sign that you’re falling in love with them.
Related: 24 Signs a Man Is Falling in Love
You’re feeling anxious or worried because you care about that person so much and don’t want to see them hurt or in any type of danger. You’re also feeling this way because you care enough about them to want to know that they’re doing alright and that they’re happy.
You find yourself constantly wanting to be around that person
If you’re falling in love with someone, you’ll find yourself wanting to be around them all the time—even when it’s not necessary or appropriate.
You might find yourself inviting your loved one to come along with you to places where they’re not really welcome or invited.
For example, you might want to invite your loved one to come along with you to meet your parents. Or, you might want to invite them to go with you to your friend’s wedding even though it’s not appropriate for your significant other to be there.
When you want to be around someone this much, and you constantly want to be in their presence, it’s usually a sign that you’re falling in love with them.
You’ve lost interest in other activities that you used to enjoy
If you’re falling in love with someone, chances are good that you’ve lost interest in certain activities that you used to enjoy.
You might have given up on your favorite sports team, stopped going to the movies, or stopped reading the types of books that you’ve always loved. You might have even started to neglect your hobbies and passions.
When you fall in love, you naturally want to spend as much time with your loved one as possible. This can cause you to neglect other activities and hobbies that you used to enjoy because you don’t want to spend your time on them.
Instead, you want to be with your loved one all the time and want to spend all of your time with them.
There’s a sense of emptiness when you’re not together
There’s a difference between missing someone and feeling a sense of emptiness when you’re not together and when you’re apart from your loved one.
You might have felt this way toward your past partners, but the feeling is different when you’re in love with someone.
You miss your loved one when you’re apart from them, but you also feel a sense of emptiness and yearning when they’re not around. You want to be with them at all times and feel as though something is missing from your life when they’re not there with you.
When you feel this way, it’s another sign that you’re falling in love with your significant other.
Jared Heathman, MD
Psychiatrist, Your Family Psychiatrist
Falling in love can look different for everyone, yet it is important to know some signs to look for when wondering if this is happening to you in your relationship.
A sign that you are falling in love is that you feel your partner’s emotions
Being in love means being attuned with your partner, emotionally and mentally. This could look like having an abundance of empathy towards your partner. If your partner is sad, you are sad as well, or vice versa.
By sharing emotions, you are able to emotionally and mentally connect and provide the type of support they need.
Prioritizing your partner’s needs is another sign you are falling in love
When you are able to identify your partner’s needs and place them before others, not including your own, it creates a sense of “we,” allowing the relationship to flourish.
You feel safe and secure being with your partner
A strong sense of attachment often brings out feelings of safety and security. Having these feelings can heighten the relationship and allow both partners to be vulnerable with their feelings, wants, and desires.
Related: How to Be Vulnerable in a Relationship
Experiencing safety and security in a relationship can also increase the level of trust and intimacy between partners, allowing for both partners to be their authentic selves without worrying about being judged.
You feel a rush of joy when thinking about them
Lastly, if you find yourself feeling euphoric or feeling a rush of joy when you think about them, you may be falling in love.
Feelings of a rush of joy can be explained by the brain sending a large amount of dopamine into the brain. Oftentimes, when an individual falls in love, they struggle to stop thinking about their partner. This can be a clear indicator of strong feelings such as love for your partner.
If you find yourself struggling to focus due to thinking of your partner, this is a sign that you may be in love.
Falling in love can be complicated yet rewarding; it is important to communicate your feelings with your partner so they can better understand your thoughts, feelings, and behaviors.
Dr. Michelle Xia
Certified Dating and Relationship Coach | Founder, Growtheart | Author, “Mini-Book of the Happy Heart“
Your claim to falling in love needs exuberant authentication since what you feel and consider can be confusing.
Sometimes you may think you’re falling in love, and deep down, it’s nothing like that. It turns out that passion is much more than a simple sexual desire in someone.
On the contrary, Love is complete admiration, with or without a desire to have sex. It is a fixation and, therefore, can’t bear duality. Love makes people happy, excited, and full of will to live.
When you are in love:
You become emotionally unpredictable
Falling in love leads to emotional, physiological, and psychological instability. Mood swings are very similar to what happens to drug users.
There is a wide variation between joy, euphoria, increased energy, insomnia, loss of appetite, tremors, racing heart, rapid breathing, as well as anxiety, panic, and feelings of despair when your relationship suffers from even the slightest setback.
When you are falling in love, you feel a complete inability to feel romantic love for another person. Your attention is completely focused on the “chosen seed.”
Studies claim that this focus comes from the dopamine release that this person releases in our mind.
Flaws become qualities
Love has the power to change the focus. When you are in love, you only focus on the qualities of the person you love. You will rarely be able to notice the flaws of the loved one, and when you do notice any, it’s because you consider it small or irrelevant next to the qualities.
It’s normal for you to find yourself looking at objects and things that remind you of your loved one.
Author, “How to Stay Married & Love It“ | Creator, Millionaire Marriage Club
Falling in love always includes the goosebumps and butterflies whenever you are about to see or are with your beloved. Those feelings may also just mean you’re sexually attracted.
But butterflies alone, or sexual attraction, are not dependable symptoms of falling into true love. True love develops if your brain is also involved.
You’re looking at your respective lifestyles and values to see if they are compatible
One of the symptoms of being more mature—ready for true love—is having realistic expectations. That means that along with the goosebumps, you’re looking at your respective lifestyles and values to see if they are compatible.
You’re noticing how they treat you, if they are courteous, if they listen to you, or if they understand your point of view.
You are projecting down the road and deciding if this is a person that would “wear well” in the long term.
- Do they love their job and are planning a future?
- Can you imagine raising a family together (if that is what you both want) and growing old together?
- Does she hope to be a stay-at-home mom?
- Do they expect to keep investing in their profession or working full time?
When you disagree, you notice if they continue communicating with respect or if they become argumentative and aggressive about their point of view.
You pay attention if they resort to pouting or accusations
How a couple manages conflict is the single most powerful determiner of whether or not the relationship will stand the test of time.
Related: How Often Do Couples Argue or Fight in a Healthy Relationship
Being able to continue communicating respectfully even when disagreeing is the quality of a “keeper.” Besides noticing the other person, notice what’s going on inside yourself.
- Are you ignoring or excusing away red flags?
- Are you afraid to express your opinion?
- Are you concerned about this person’s attitude about their family?
- Are you feeling safe enough to disclose past relationships and financial obligations mutually?
Enjoy the goosebumps, but if you are also getting positive results when you ask these questions of yourself and your partner, then there’s a good chance you’re falling into true love.
If there is any hesitation about the answers you’re getting, then either give it more time (keep asking those questions) or wait for the partner whose behaviors are reassuring and whose own heart’s questions bring peaceful answers.
Clinical Director, ChoicePoint
Being in love can be a magical experience. It is also the time in life when you are most vulnerable. Here are some signs that you are falling in love.
You are curious about them
Are you showing a little concern about the person you met? Do you like listening to them tell you how their day went? Then I can successfully conclude that you are falling in love.
The first sign of falling in love is that you listen to the other person with all your heart. The sound of their voice is your favorite thing. You want them to tell you all the little things about them.
They are all that you think about
Another sign of falling in love is that you start to think about what they like and dislike. They are always in your thoughts and like what you are thinking about.
You imagine different situations where they are with you. You start making conversations in your mind and find yourself engrossed in those conversations for the longest time.
They are the first thing you think about in the morning
Know that you are in love 100% if they are the first thought that comes to you as soon as you open your eyes. Loving someone means that you are starting to give them a place in your life.
Thinking about someone in the morning is a surefire way to know that love is indeed in the air.
Frequently Asked Questions
What should you do if you think you are falling in love with someone?
If you think you are falling in love with someone, here are some things you can do:
Enjoy the feeling: Falling in love is wonderful, so enjoy it while it lasts.
Take it slow: Although jumping headfirst into a relationship when you’re in love is tempting, taking things slowly and getting to know the person is important.
Communicate your feelings: If you fall for someone, let them know how you feel. Communication is key in any relationship.
Take care of yourself: Falling in love can be all-consuming, but it’s important that you take care of yourself as well. Make sure you still make time for your own hobbies and interests.
Be open to the possibility of rejection: It’s important to be open to the possibility that the other person might not feel the same way. Rejection is never easy, but it’s part of life, and it’s better to be honest with your feelings than to bottle them up.
Is it possible to fall in love with someone who has different values?
It is possible to fall in love with someone who has different values, but it can be challenging to maintain a relationship with someone whose values are fundamentally different from your own. Here are some things to keep in mind:
Can you find common ground? It’s important to find common ground with your partner and try to understand their values. You don’t have to agree on everything, but finding common values can help you build a strong relationship.
Can you respect each other’s values? It’s important to respect your partner’s values, even if you don’t share them. If you can respect each other’s values, the relationship will likely work.
Can you compromise? Compromise is important in any relationship, ‘especially if you have different values. You need to find a way to compromise and find solutions that work for both of you.
Are your values deal breakers? You need to figure out if your partner’s values are a deal-breaker for you. Building a lasting relationship may be difficult if their values contradict your core beliefs and values.
Can it be dangerous to fall in love?
Falling in love can be a wonderful experience, but it can also be dangerous if you aren’t careful. Here are some possible dangers you should watch out for:
Losing yourself: It’s important to keep your own identity and interests, even when you’re in love. If you focus too much on the other person, you may lose sight of who you are.
Ignoring red flags: When you’re in love, it’s easy to ignore red flags or warning signs. It’s important to listen to your instincts and pay attention to any red flags.
Moving too quickly: When you’re in love, it’s tempting to act quickly and make big decisions. It’s important to take things slowly and make sure you’re both on the same page.
Becoming too dependent: It’s important to maintain a sense of independence, even when you’re in love. If you become too dependent on the other person, it can be dangerous when the relationship ends.
Getting hurt: Falling in love can also be dangerous because there is always a risk of getting hurt. It is important that you’re aware of this risk and take steps to protect yourself emotionally.
Can you fall in love with someone you have known for a long time?
Yes, it is possible to fall in love with someone you have known for a long time. Some people even believe that the strongest relationships are built on a foundation of friendship. Here are some things you should keep in mind:
Shared experiences: If you’ve known someone for a long time, you’ve probably had many experiences together. These shared experiences can create a strong bond and a deep understanding.
Emotional connection: If you’ve known someone for a long time, you’ve probably had many conversations and shared many feelings. This can lead to a deep emotional connection that can be the foundation for a romantic relationship.
Trust: Trust is an important part of any relationship, and if you’ve known someone for a long time, you’ve probably built up a high level of trust.
Compatibility: If you’ve known someone for a long time, you probably have a good sense of their values, interests, and personality. This will help you determine if you’re a good match as love partners.
Can falling in love be different for different people?
Yes, falling in love can be different for different people. Love is a complex emotion influenced by many factors, such as personality, culture, and life experience. Here are some ways falling in love can be different for different people:
Expression of love: Different people may express their love in different ways. Some people may express their love through words, while others express it through actions or gifts.
Intensity of love: Some people may fall in love deeply and intensely, while others may experience a more gradual and gentle form of love.
Criteria for love: People may have different criteria for falling in love. Some people may be attracted to physical appearance, while others may prioritize personality or shared values.
Cultural factors: Different cultures may have different expectations or norms when it comes to falling in love. For example, some cultures value arranged marriages or family involvement in relationships.
Personal history: Personal history can also play a role in falling in love. Past relationship experiences, family dynamics, and life experiences can influence the way a person experiences love.
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